War against bugs!

I wish I could tell you that we're going to be able to eliminate all bug use in America, but that would be insincere. We will spare no expense to wipe out computer viruses, which are responsible for fully one-hundredth of one percent of lost productivity due to bugs. And you can rest assured that we will lean heavily on the cheapo shareware and freeware channels. I have the notorious Richard Stallman under FBI surveillance right now. But there will be a few common bugs that will not come under the jurisdiction of the BEA. We have no intention of harrassing Microsoft, Ashton-Tate, Lotus, or any other producer of the fine software that has made this nation what it is today. After all, the occasional system crash is not really a bug. We will, however, continue to restrict use of their products on commercial air flights.

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